Visualisation and memory

I ran a half marathon on 30 August 2015.

In preparation, I watched a video clip someone had posted of the route. This enabled me to think about how I would approach the run to pace myself, particularly with there being a long uphill section at the outset and the prospect of slower runners to overtake.

On the day of the race, I told myself to enjoy it. This was the race for real, not the visualisation.

It struck me that the memory I would be left with would be very similar to the visualisation, if everything went to plan.

Of course, the memory has real moments that I could not have imagined: the runner dressed as spiderman, the spectator who thought it hilarious to shout 'take your feet of the brakes' as the runners streamed past, the extreme weather during the last 5 km.

But much of what I recall of the race could just as well be from the visualisation. My memory tag is stopping at a prearranged point along the route for a photo with my wife. That image was already in my visualisation.

Visualisation and memory are both proxies.

The reality was the experience.

I have my next race already booked.

Running on the spot

When I stay at my mother-in-law's house, I am pretty much confined to it.

It is in a built-up area and my in-laws are against me going out for runs around the neighbourhood.

So I've gone from running 20 - 40 km per week to zero.

After I week, I was feeling imprisoned. Which prompted me to have a quick look on the internet for exercise regimes when in prison.

I haven't adopted any, but just reading that it is possible to stay fit and strong living in a cell set me on my way.

I now look forward to the opportunity to do exercises on my arms and stomach and some leg muscles that I have long thought I should do. Cross training is encouraged to develop strength that helps with running, but isn't necessarily developed by running.

I also realised I needed to get my heart racing to clear out the cobwebs. To begin with I tried steps for 20 minutes, which did the job, but brought on a twinge to the knee I injured last April (my memory tag for 23 April 2014).

Instead, I've introduced running on the spot. Which is surprisingly like running around the block, except I go nowhere, it is sweatier and I land much more on the front of my foot.

In fact, it turns out to be a good way to study my gait without worrying that I might veer into the road or the hedge. Plus my knee is now fine.

Another year ends

The end of the third calendar year where I can remember what I was doing on every single day draws close. As many people are probably saying, it seems hard to believe 2014 is nearly over. For me, it is not just the approach of the new year that is a shock, but that the year still seems so fresh.

Today, I recalled the events of 29 and 30 December 2013, as I have done once a month. I can shut my eyes and drop through the image pinned to my mental calendar and feel I am there again. The same is true for those dates in 2012 and 2011. The difference of perception is not so much due to the separation in time, but the events that have passed, including engaging in this process. I and my loved ones have changed through ageing and experiences.

I can label these years of remembering with themes, which help me as much as the years to place the memories. There are different themese - or developing stories. Here are some:

2012 was the year we spent most of the time in a flat we loved (after a tricky start) and I began to run more regularly and entered my first 5 km races. The year ended with our niece being diagnosed with cancer.

2013 became the year of our niece's illness and separation from my wife for months at a time as she cared for her, until she passed away towards the end of the year. It was the year I joined a running club, ran 5 km most Saturday's in the park and moved up to 10 km races.

2014 almost seems too new to settle on themes. It is the year of my wife and her sister's family trying to come to terms with the loss of a young life, though that is not yet over, and the fall of my mother-in-law at the end of the year has not helped. My running progress continues. After an injury - a pulled muscle - drove me to a physiotherapist for professional assessment of my posture, together with reading and experimentation, I have reduced my 5 km and 10 km times significantly, as well as run my fist half marathons.

This process has become part of my daily life. I have adapted it so it does not become too much of a distraction. This won't be sustainable if I have to spend a long time lost in the review process.

There are many gains. I not only remember where I was, but use memory tags to capture other information such as names, birthdays, restaurants to visit again, names of birds and trees, and so on. This process also gives me balance and perspective.

All things pass. I know like never before that a challenging day ahead will become a memory. I can choose what I carry with me and may prefer to make my memory tag the sights of a new town rather than focusing on the difficult meeting I had there.

A pleasurable time is something to relish; at the time or in retrospect, I have often said to myself, 'This is one of the best days of my life'. Sitting with my wife looking across a lake as the sunset after visiting a Christmas market at the beginning of December, I said to her too, 'This is a moment to remember'.

My mental calendar for 2015 is currently clear for when I step onto it later this week - except for some dates with events scheduled - such as running my first marathon in April.

Funny walks

This is the year I moved up in my running to half marathon distance. Various memory tags recall the progression.

My first 21 km training run on 21 April made me over confident. I pulled a muscle in my knee two days later, which interrupted my running for 6 weeks.

My first half marathon race was on 6 July. Time just under two hours.

Then I embarked on a training schedule to improve my time and knocked 15 minutes off in my next half marathon just over two months later.

In the final half marathon of the year before easing back on the training, I knocked another 5 minutes off my time, while feeling much more comfortable on the run. My pace over the 21 km was 4:37/km, which also gave me my fastest 10 km time of about 46 minutes.

I am now going to concentrate of 5 km and 10 km races for a while to try to improve my pace further. My next race will be 10 km and I have a target to beat 45 mins.

I feel I am still a long way from my potential. At the moment I sense improvement will come from strengthening my leg muscles to improve power and technique.

On training runs I think about two aspects to strengthen my hamstring muscles: semitendinosus, semimembranosus and biceps femoris (long and short head). I'm cribbing this information from this website: http://lrgoodman.hubpages.com/hub/Muscles-Used-While-Running

At some point I think about pushing further back to strenthen the hip-flexing function of the muscles.

At another point, I think of the knee-flexing function, so lift my heels more powerfully.

It feels like I am Monty Python's Ministry of Funny Walks. Going from a flat, extended rhythm to a bumpy, bum flicking trot. Both exercises cause my legs to ache in a good way, telling me the muscles are working.

At inervals, I'll recover by easing back on these exercises. My achilles-flexing push-off then becomes more of a focus.

Then I try putting it all together, which is faster, but tiring. With time, as my muscles strengthen, I will hopefully become faster and less tired.

My 5 km time is already falling and consistently below 21 minutes. My next target is to knock a few seconds off my best time to drop below 20 mins.

In praise of physiotherapists - part two

A while ago (19 May 2014) I wrote in praise of physiotherapists after I pulled the ligament by my inner right knee. I visited a phsyio for guidance on how to recover and instead also gained a diagnosis on changing my running style through stretching different muscles to avoid problems in future.

As I go through the reviews of my memory tags, the story plays out as follows:

21 April 2014: I set out to try running at a half marathon pace of 6 mins/km to see how it felt – and ended up running a half marathon distance (21 km).

23 April 2014: Confident I had it in me to complete a half marathon, I started to think about training for one. But on my run this day, I felt a tear near my right knee and had to walk home with it burning.

25 April 2014: One thing this process of remembering every day that passes bring home, is that episodes pass. To show my believe in this fact, when I saw an early-bird discount for a full marathon next April, I signed up. In the afternoon, I visited the sports shop and looked for a new pair of running shoes. The age of my old ones may have contributed to my injury.

26 April 2014: Instead of running in the park as usual on a Saturday morning, my wife and I went for a walk.

27 April 2014: Today we cycled. My knee could cope with this.

2 May 2014: I bought the new running shoes. But had still not returned to running.

9 May 2014: I visited the physio for advice on whether to rest or to exercise etc. Came away with exercises to help me change my gait. Told not to run for a week.

19 May 2014: Checked out clips on running gait and wrote the post In praise of physiotherapists - part one. The title was in expectation that one day I would write this post.

21 May 2014: Tried a short run. Muscles ached, but knee okay.

22 May 2014: Bought a foam roller to massage muscles.

26 May 2014: Went on a 40 km cycle ride as cross training.

28 May 2014: Started running again. Now doing my exercises each day.

8 June 2014: Ran a 10 km race. Knee fine, but bad approach, going out too fast and struggling at the end.

15 June 2014: Ran another 10 km race. This time, purposely started out slowly and build up the pace for a strong finish, passing many of those who passed me at the beginning in the second half of the race. Feeling back on track and looked for a half marathon to enter.

20 June 2014: Went for a haircut prior to seeing the physio okay to evaluate progress. The barber sneers at the idea of visiting a physio saying he had never met one who knew anything useful. I beg to differ, saying mine had dealt with my injury and the root cause of the problem.

6 July 2014: Ran my first ever half marathon – in just under two hours.

That was 10 weeks from injury to achieving my goal of running a half marathon.

Some of the above milestones along the way come up in each of my reviews.

Life is lived forwards, but understood looking backwards. This story now has a beginning, middle and end.

Now I am in a new chapter: building toward my first marathon in April 2015.

In praise of physiotherapists - part one

The images pinned to my mental calendar as memory tags can track a developing story.

The associations that arise between them makes recall easier, particularly during my review process (see the 'Refresh Technique' under 'About me' on the right).

However, this process is much more powerful than that. For example, it enables me to track developments.

One such example is my progress as a runner.

I know the date I ran my first 5 km race and the dates of all the races since. With nice symmetry, my first 10 km race took place a year after my first 5 km race, in parallel with the next edition of it.  I remember where and when I bought each pair of new running shoes. I remember significant developments in my technique, such as watching the running clips on youtube on 10 November 2013 to learn to run like an Olympian.

And I remember getting injured, which happened to me on 23 April 2014.

Running had been going so well, to the point that I began to think of moving up to half marathon distance. So on 21 April I set out to see how I felt running at that pace, which I reckoned for me would be about 6 min/km. It felt so sustainable I ended up running for 21 km.

I ached a little, but was otherwise fine and so checked out dates for forthcoming races. I had a rest day, then set out for a short run, doing a few kms at the same 6 min/km pace, then upping the speed.

After a couple more km I had to stop as a twinge in my right knee deteriorated over 100 metres into the sharp pain of a torn ligament. I know next time to spot the signs and stop sooner.

After some days of massaging it and applying ice, I wasn't sure whether more rest or a return to gentle running would be best. A short run told me I was not ready. So I booked to see a physiotherapist, reasoning that when serious athletes injure themselves they have professional support to return to activity in the shortest possible time.

The physio I visited was wonderful. I went looking for advice on the best recovery strategy, more than treatment, but gained a thorough assessment of why I had been injured in the first place and how to prevent a recurrence.

I was diagnosed with weak hip muscles which meant my knees are displaced towards my instep. This was more pronounced on my right leg, as shown by the wear on my running shoes.

The solution is a variety of exercises to strengthen my hip muscles and stretch my calf muscles. Some feel unnatural. My feet have been incorrectly positioned for years, explaining a whole host of other issues, including why I didn't progress well with downhill skiing.

So I've spent today looking closely at the feet of people around me to see where they point as they walk. This evening I looked again at youtube for clips of foot strike.

What to me still feels like an unatural inward twist of my feet puts them in the same position as many of the running coaches I see in the clips. My insteps should be parallel, not pointing outwards. A lot of people do not walk or even run like this, but here are a couple of clips I have found that show what I mean, even if this is not their primary purpose.

This is a useful exercise involving running up steps.



The guy's feet point forwards, not outwards.

This is about foot position more generally.




From the above, I can see where I am aiming, but having expert advice from a physiotherapist has been essential for me. I have learned I have some fairly serious corrections to make and have the confidence to make them, even though the pain in my right knee has now been replaced by the aches in muscles that are stretching and working in new ways.

The physio said that I should notice an improvement in my running performance as more muscles will come fully into operation when I am in better alignment.

Once again, I feel as if I am only at the beginning of this adventure.

Here's another intersting exercise I came across in my youtube search.

Learning to run

I realise now that I do not even know how to run properly. I am having to learn.

Running has always been a part of my life, from my earliest memories of running around in the sun till I had heat stroke, to hating cross country at school, to becoming a regular runner for health when a student, to starting to enter races on 2 September 2012 (my memory tag for that day).

I have progressively become faster since that first race, moving up to 10 km races and running the last in 48 minutes.

But now, as I read 'The Art of Running Faster' and watch Olympic runners closely, I realise I do not know how to run properly at all.

There are moments now on training runs when I start to feel, 'This is running'.

On 14 November 2013, I went for a long run as I had received some sad news. Perhaps it was because I was meditating on this rather than thinking of running, it suddenly came together.

Instead of stretching forward in an attempt to go faster, I was pushing back against the earth. My focus was on the balls of my feet launching me forward.

As I landed with a more bent knee, I felt lower to the ground, and lowering myself further settled me more into true running.

By the end, as I neared home, my breathing was almost leisurely, but my legs were moving rapidly and stretching long behind me.

It was lack of strength in my legs that became the limiting factor, not oxygen debt. I was entering a new level of efficiency of movement, and suddenly I felt like a child again, running to see what it felt like, what my body could do, opening a door to a whole new world of possibilities.

My legs ached afterwards and the next day as muscles had been used and stretched like never before.

The point of the stretching exercises in the book suddenly became apparent, to lengthen out that movement.

Only now that I realise how little I know can I really start to learn.

My weekly runs in the park are a guage of what difference changing my running can make. Today my time for the 5 km run was not only a personal best for the course, but my fastest ever 5 km, at 21.41.

This is an amazing 30 seconds faster than my previous best.

It was a little tough going. I used a 5-step rhythmic breathing cycle for the first km (3 inhaling, 2 exhaling), then switched to 3-step (2 inhaling, 1 exhaling).

Whenever I felt I was overdoing the effort, I tried to stretch my trailing leg a little more, settle down by bend in my leading leg a little more and easing up slightly on the step rate.

I needed a minute to recover at the end, but did not feel as a bad as when I set my last PB.

Running like an Olympian

My memory tag for 9 November 2013 is getting below 23 minutes for a 5 km Saturday run in the park. It is not the fastest course as it has a couple of inclines and I've been trying for a while to bring my time below this threshold. I managed 22:55.

The book The Art of Running Faster has helped me with its tips on running with faster, such as running with faster strides, even if they are shorter. (This is an unsolicited recommendation).

I am still reading the book, but now I am trying to follow its advice to run so that my centre of gravity is above or slightly in front of my leading foot when it lands.

Today I watched the 5,000 metres at the London Olympics, won by Mo Farah of Great Britain.



I can see how the runners' feet strike the ground below their bodies and their legs extend to launch them forwards for the next foot to strike, with the knee of that leg bent.

It also struck me how high the feet of the runners rise behind them, to the level of their backsides, as they bend the knee almost fully, to bring their leg forward again. Julian Goater talks of following a cycling motion.

This slow motion film of foot strikes from a 10,000 metre olympic qualifying race show more clearly how the trailing leg fully extends to launch the runner forward.

This is far from the energy-conserving shuffle I fall into, where my mind is more on the leg traveling forward than the leg stretching behind me.



I tried it out running tonight and it felt very strange. As when I taught myself to juggle, I found it useful to concentrate on one thing at a time, in the hope that, with time, my subconscious would keep good control of the other aspects.

Doing some hill repetitions (actually over a hump-backed footbridge), I used very short steps, running on the balls of my feet to build up the muscle memory.

Running on the flat, I tried to continue that approach, landing on the balls of my feet, placing my feet underneath me.

Doing it the old way, stretching forward to connect with the ground, striking with the heel, turns my foot into a pivot I have to rise over - I am effectively braking myself with every stride.

Julian Goater speaks of falling forward and placing your foot to stop the fall, rather than reaching forward.

With my mind on the Mo Farah run, I tried to concentrate on extending my trailing leg to launch myself forward onto my other foot. This was a little difficult to do at speed, so instead of thinking of every step, I linked it to my rhythmic breathing count: two steps inhaling - "push!" - land on the other foot - one step exhaling.

This was effective, and also worked with the slower rhythm: three seps inhaling - "push!" - land on the other foot - two steps exhaling.

At other times, I tried to think of landing with the knee of my front leg bent, ready for the extension to propel me forwards.

It did not come together very well at all and my legs ached like bruised apples afterwards.

But I can reflect on the elements and try to bring them together in future runs.

Today is the first day I tried to run like Mo Farah.

Running better

My memory tag for 3 November is running a 10 km race, specifically sprinting for the finish line.

It was my third 10 km race and I knocked two minutes of my previous personal best time.

Having entered my first ever race - 5 km - on Sunday 2 September 2012 (my memory tag for that day), I have been reading about running and introducing some of the ideas into my training and racing.

Two factors led not only a faster time, but to my legs actually feeling better after the race than when I began.

The first is rhythmic breathing, which I came across in the book "Running on Air" by Budd Coates.

I link to it here on the site of the publisher, Runners World, totally independently (see my advertising policy):
http://www.runnersworld.com/running-tips/running-air-breathing-technique

The concept is simply explained: synchronise breathing to steps. The basic rhythm is 3 steps inhaling followed by 2 steps exhaling. To go up a gear, switch to 2 steps inhaling to 1 step exhaling.

I've been experimenting with this for the past few weeks and the rhythm has started to become natural, such that no counting is involved.

The second tip I have come across in various places: more efficient running involves a fast cadence, or step rate, of about 180 steps per minute.

A fast cadence for me involves running with a shorter stride length. Maintaining a fast cadence with longer stride length means you cover a lot more ground and win races - but need to be a lot stronger than I am.

All the same, combining rhythmic breathing with fast cadence made all the difference in the race.

I was whizzing past other runners, having started near the back, but felt totally comfortable.

It struck me that as my breathing cycle was tied to my fast cadence, I was sucking in enough air not to build up an oxygen deficit.

My plan had been to run 5 km easy and then up the pace for the second 5 km, but as my time was good, I kept to the same rhythm until I reached 8 km.

Then I moved up a gear to the 3-step breathing cycle. This gave me even more oxygen and a fresh burst of speed.

When I hit the 250 metre marker, I began to sprint for the finish, switching to a 2-step cycle, one in, one out. Budd Coates says to use a 2:1:1:1 cycle, but I didn't have the concentration for that as I passed a dozen other runners in reaching the finish line.

I was breathless when I finished, but quickly recovered, without having to collapse on the ground as in some other races.

The amazing thing was the state of my legs. Usually after a race, I am incapacitated with aching joints through the following week and need a few days before I can even think of running.

I was already a little nervous about twinges in my legs after putting in a good time in a 5 km run in the park the Saturday of the preceding week and was wary of developing shin splints in my training runs before this race.

But after knocking two minutes off my 10 km time, I felt as if I had cleared my legs of the threatening ailments. I've had a rest day today, but don't feel wary of running tomorrow.

I was still 10 minutes slower than the winner in the M40 category so have a long way to improve.

But I feel I am still on the journey and have not yet arrived at my destination.

I also have a map to follow.

Running diary

It was a year ago today that I spoke with a friend about my running as I had been recording my runs on an iPhone app and measuring my average pace. As a result of that conversation, I decided to follow his example and enter a timed road race. My first event is my memory tag for 2 September 2012.

As I went through the review of the images pinned to the 26th day of each month today, two things struck me. Firstly, the pleasure of knowing where I was a year ago and what I was doing. This ability is part of my reality now, but the second thing that struck me was that on 26 August 2012, I would have been hard pressed to say where I was the year before. This new reality is new.

On the subject of running, I am now regularly taking part in group runs on Saturday mornings. Although I keep a record of the road races I enter (and souvenirs such as my chest number, the flier and the results list), I haven't been noting these group runs down. I decided to start doing so as I am experimenting with running technique - last Saturday I tried increasing the number of paces per minute after reading in a magazine that the optimal rate is 180/minute, according to some. My breathing could not keep up!

I decided to go through my app history and write down all of the past runs in a little black book as well - in the same magazine a famous runner had mentioned her running diary. I devised a set of headings and pulled up the details from the app: date, distance, time, pace. I thought the pace information would be useful to see how I progressed over time.

Among the figures, the 15 July 2012 stood out as particularly slow. In an instant I knew why - that was the day I pulled a muscle in my leg. It is the memory tag for the day.

It wasn't often the case that a run was my memory tag, but as I wrote the entries, I often checked my mental calendar to recall what I had been doing on that day to place the run within it.

Tipping point

My memory tag for 28 April 2013 is a run in the park and reaching a tipping point in my Global Postural Reeducation experiment.

I guess it comes down to geometry.

I have been doing exercises to stop my head projecting, stretching the muscles of my neck so my spine is a little more vertical over my body. This picture on the Dr Sam Tocco site shows it well.

My head needs to move from the poor posture on the right to the vertical posture on the left.

If my neck and the muscles surrounding it are the hypotenuse of a right-angled triangle, with the base being the vertical line I am aiming for, the change required in its length as it approaches vertical becomes less the closer to vertical it is. In other words, less stretch is needed as vertical is approached, until the hypotenuse and the base coincide.

I noticed this when running on 28 April 2013 - it is my memory tag for that day. I find I loosen up after a few kilometres and on this day it meant my neck could assume the vertical position without straining against resisting muscles. It felt like a weight off my shoulders!

Not only did I no longer have to force my head back to achieve vertical, I had the flexibility to overshoot. In fact, if I wanted I could arch my spine with my belly or chest projecting instead of my head. I felt free, able to choose the posture to bring my body into balance.

As I slipped into this equilibrium position my point of visual focus suddenly extended into the distance. With my head no longer jumping around, I had a stable platform to look from.

Fixing on the path in the distance, externalised my viewpoint.

Suddenly I remembered how it felt to run 20 years ago, with my trunk virtually immobile as my legs did the running. The roll of my shoulders also disappeared; my arms just pumped back and forth. I was a running machine.

It felt so liberating.

I thought I will remember this moment for ever by making it my memory tag for today.

Head on my shoulders

My memory tag for 22 March 2013 is my first session of Global Postural Reeducation (GPR).

I've had another session since then and have been doing the exercises every morning. The main purpose of these is to stretch the muscles around my spine to correct my posture, particularly the chin up and forward position of my head.

My head doesn't really want to go to where it should be, though that is changing. This is most noticeable in the exercise laying on my back, close to the wall so my legs are pressed against it as they point to the ceiling. My feet are flexed downwards and a thin pillow under my head corrects the tendency for my head to throw backwards. Instead my neck is straight and I try to tip my head downwards, though it will not move beyond looking straight up at the ceiling.

Part of the point of GPR is the feedback between body and mind. I am beginning to feel what is the correct position. This stays with me more and more. So much so that when I run, I can slip into what feels almost to be the correct position, particularly as my neck muscles relax as the run progresses.

It is interesting to look at past photographs, where I can see how I am sitting or standing incorrectly. Some new ones will show how much that has changed.

As yet, my new improved posture has not stopped the violent cracks from my neck vertebrae when I sit too long at the computer. Hopefully that will come.

Running

I decided to take my running up a gear and enter a race.

That is part of my memory tag for Sunday 2 September 2012.

It was a 5 km circuit, a distance I knew I could do comfortably. I opted for this rather than the 10 km option as it would be the first time I had run in a group.

I was conscious of the need to not go off too fast. After the start I was towards the back of the group of 11 that had turned out. I paced off a runner in front of me, then overtook her during the third km, repeating this on the next runner in the fourth km, to come in fifth with a time of 26:09 min.

The iPhone app MapMyFitness gave the distance as 4.8 km and a pace of 5:31 mins/km.

The app uploads the details to the website where you can see the split times.

I went from 5:39 pace early on to 5:10 at the finish.

This is much better than the around 7 min/km on my jogs, which are usually between 8 and 12 km, though in training this week I introduced a "go for it" short route of about 3 km, which I did at 5:26 min/km pace. My breathing and effort seemed much more manageable in the race than in that fast training route, however.

So 5:31 mins/km is now my personal best for 5 km (perhaps a better measure than overall time if course lengths are goiong to be a bit variable).